This can lead to codependency, which is when one person becomes too reliant on another for their emotional needs. While it’s important to be supportive, it’s also important to maintain your own sense of self-worth and independence. Just because your partner is sober, it doesn’t mean that you have to be. However, drinking or using other substances around them can be a difficult temptation for them to resist and make them feel unsupported. Particularly in the early stages, try to keep your shared space sober-friendly.

It can also be challenging to deal with the negative impact addiction has on your relationship. Addiction often leads to financial problems, communication difficulties, and even infidelity. If you’re dealing with addiction in your marriage, it’s important to seek help from a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate these challenges. Substance abuse can create a rift between spouses, causing trust issues, communication breakdowns, and financial strain. This means that when someone enters recovery, it is not only a personal journey but also a journey that impacts their loved ones and their closest relationship. If you need further help or support during the relationship recovery process, consider speaking with an individual, family, or couples therapist.

Kyle’s made lots of lifestyle changes to “be really clear” about everything

The clear lines of communication spouses established during those early years of sobriety have borne fruit. When conflict comes up, both partners are able to express themselves clearly and concisely and come to a resolution. Because drugs or alcohol aren’t an all-consuming addiction anymore, spouses can fully be present and enjoy each other’s company—and that can lead to a renewed appreciation of each other. There is also a greater understanding of a partner’s trigger situations, and couples know how to avoid them. Couples may also be taking the necessary steps to make sure their marriage stays healthy. CAP, ICADC, CHC CEO and President at The Shores Treatment & Recovery of Florida.

marriage changes after sobriety

Trying to make a relationship work with a partner who’s living with addiction can be an incredibly complex and challenging journey. With Bill’s sobriety, the quality of our relationship improved enough for us to marry. However, it’s not a cliché to say that our journey was far from linear.

Learn about substance use disorder

Lyle was VP of a 6-county homeless coalition and a founding member of the Mental Health Action Team in Miami-Dade County. He has served as a Consultant & Licensure Specialist to numerous facilities and has served as a Drug Court Panel member. He is also a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC), and the International Substance Abuse & Addiction Coalition (ISAAC).

marriage changes after sobriety

It’s likely that spouses will go through times when they question whether their marriage can endure sobriety. There are still difficulties to be overcome, but by being aware of the dangers, spouses can cooperate to do so. But I can tell you that I was proud of my husband for admitting he had a problem and desperately wanting to overcome this and return to life as normal.

Is my partner actively seeking help and change?

The marriage won’t look the same as it used to, back in the days of addiction, but that can be a good thing. What I initially regretted was Bill’s lost charm and warmth. I was attracted to his sensibilities and the ease with which he could be just as comfortable in his business suit as his biking gear. In early recovery, his affect was very abrupt, and his affection felt stiff.

marriage changes after sobriety

These are a few striking examples of how sobriety transforms our relationships. We can maintain healthy relationships with the people we care about and feel confident in the decisions we’re making because of our sobriety. Both the addict and the spouse experience significant and life-changing consequences from the decision to pursue sobriety. As the person in recovery experiences withdrawal symptoms, which can be very severe, it can be physically taxing.

In the first few months, the novelty of a new country and life was enough to keep my drinking a mostly social endeavor, albeit a reckless one. Codependency can continue to affect marriages even after your partner has become sober. If the partner living with SUD hasn’t found healthy ways to cope with the trauma or PTSD, then it could begin to affect them in negative ways.

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